Reasons why I could never do a reality tv show

Besides the fact that no one would watch it.

1. The way I look and sound for the first at 20 minutes of every day.

Not to sound mellow dramatic, but I often feel as though I am very slowly dying from sleep deprivation. Ok, that sounds quite mellow dramatic. It is my honest feeling though. And it is my excuse for the frightful way in which I begin each day. Usually, a bright eyed Eden sneaks into my room, after finally getting too bored playing on her own for however long it has been since she got up with the chickens, puts her little face 3 inches from mine and she begins: "Hi Mommy. Can you get me some ceweal (cereal)? I wan (want) frosted mini wheats. Do you have frosted mini wheats? Can you wook (look) downstairs for frosted mini wheats? Can I have owen wooose (orange juice)? Can you put owen woose in the pink cup?" and on and on she goes, while I try to pry my eyes open and stumble to the kitchen, grunting responses to her.

2. "Kate" does not rhyme with "three".

3. Sing along books. We have this one, and another similar to it. They are great and I love them:


there's just one problem with them:

I can actually carry a tune. An average voice, but I can a carry a tune. These books, however, are all made in the worst possible key for anyone. So as my kiddies and I crowd on to the couch and they take turns picking which song Mommy will squeak or croak (there is no in between) through next, I am so glad that no one but my children can hear me.

4. Pajamas. Me and my children go to bed each night looking homeless. It's true. Although matching sets/cute night gowns do exist, by that particular point each day, I've stopped caring about matching and cuteness. You see, we most definitely match during the day, with hair bows, socks and shoes that "go" as I we say. But by jammie time, I just can't care anymore. So the girls put on whatever. If it's clean, I'm good with it. Sometimes I'm good with it even if it's not clean.

Now that I think of it, even if we did wear our cutest jammies, I don't want anyone to see them. Although apparently by the assortment of plaid and sports themed flannel I often see there, PJs are perfectly acceptable to wear to WalMart.

5. We're weird. I suppose that is what the attraction to reality TV is... a display of oddness that is more common than we dare think. But I'd rather keep our particular brand of weirdness private. Well, not completely private.. I am blogging at this very moment about it, aren't I?. But writing it as opposed to watching it still gives me control over what exact acts of strangeness I share and what we just keep to ourselves. Like I wish I could have done when Maddie announced to every person standing our church foyer that she has warts on her hand. Ewww. Oops. I just shared that again.

That is all. 5 important reasons.

Love,