Friday, March 4, 2011

Sleep

We're not getting enough of it around here.

After a few months of nice long stretches at night time (about 10:30pm until about 5am), Leila has regressed back to wanting to nurse every 3 hrs. around the clock. I'm struggling to keep up with this new schedule she has picked for us. :/

After my post last week about not being tofu, I'm feeling rather tofu-ish. Being tired makes chocolate-like behavior extra difficult. It almost seems like I'm back to newborn stage... Leila is simply not content unless being held, AND being held in certain ways. Thinking that she was over 4 months and needing more substance in her diet, I started her on rice cereal last week. She gobbled it up fairly well for a beginner, but it didn't seem to agree with her tummy. After two episodes of vomiting (not spitting up... VOMITING) I have put the cereal away. Yesterday, I tried peas instead. So far, no problem but neither is she any happier. Maybe she has a cold? Everyone else I know does. I don't see any other symptoms other than grouchiness and an apparent inability to sleep well unless being cuddled.

By now, someone out there is probably debating whether they should comment and tell me that I'm spoiling her. Part of me would agree and part of me says phooey on that. Babies like being held, and I like holding babies. But I do need to put them down sometimes. I know: she needs to develop her self soothing mechanisms and cultivate healthy sleep habits. I'm just not going to let her cry it out. Sorry. Not saying crying it out is wrong. I have done it in the past... but it never was necessary until the other girls were much older. In both cases it happened like this:

Somewhere between 1 and 1 1/2 yrs. old, the girl would get sick. Of course, I'd take care of them throughout the night for a few nights. Then, after the sickness had past, baby girl decided she rather enjoyed visiting all hours of the night and wanted to keep it up. And mommy, seeing that they were no longer sick, would put them in their cribs and say night night, see you in the morning. Little girl cried for 5 minutes, figured out that I wasn't coming back, and went back to sleep.

So, at 4 months, I'm just not doing it. She wants to nurse, and she does go back to sleep after nursing but not for as long as I like. I planned to make the whole first year breast milk only, but formula (offered by someone other than me....) is becoming more tempting by the minute. I have frozen breast milk defrosting right now, and a bottle and bottle warmer set out on the counter. Let us see if Seth catches my drift. ☺

This morning, I was feeling beyond tired. I was feeling blue. I know I'm in desperate need of a good night's sleep when my normally optimistic view of life takes a downward spiral. Not only did I feel tired, but my life was dismal and sad and I was a pathetic wife and lousy mommy and my house is in disarray and the dog died. Well, we don't actually have a dog but if we did, it would have died this morning. So naturally, I made a pot of coffee. ☺ After two giant mugs of Dunkin' Donuts, I had way more caffeine than I could handle. Instead of helping, I was now irritable and shaky. Booo.

Around 2, I put Eden down for her nap, sent Maddie to "help" Daddy run errands and laid down with Leila in my bed. I am never comfortable co-sleeping but I figured desperate times call for desperate measures. I nursed Leila to sleep and tried to doze off myself. Instead I just laid there thinking how pretty she looked. Then I just had to take a picture. There, I thought. NOW I'll sleep. Nope. Too jittery. Gotta get up and get that picture on my blog RIGHT NOW.


Thus, here I am.



It reminded me of this picture of Maddie from last June. My kids looks so beautiful sleeping. They should do it more often.

Almost as soon as I sat down at my computer, Leila sensed I was no longer in the bed with her and commenced wailing. She is now happily snoozing again... in my lap. Hopefully I didn't scare your comments off. Please do leave your suggestions for a unsatisfied little sweetie. Just don't tell me anything a weary mama couldn't handle. Thank you. ☺

Love,



8 comments:

Tara McCoy said...

I KNOW I KNOW ~ I'm a cry it out mom.

Here's my advice to you ~ if Seth can handle it ~ let him do it. Go out for a little while, get a coffee and sit down and read at Barnes and Noble. That way you aren't around to have the crying wear on your nerves. And it gets you away from the house, free from it all. Don't go home until he calls and tells you that she is out. It won't hurt her. I've done it with all my boys (well, Gunner not so much, he came out of NICU self soothing and never had problems with him self soothing himself to sleep) and I'm told they have turned out (so far) pretty good ;) But, with Xavier, I literally had to put him down, and go outside and work in the yard and check in on him every 10 minutes or so(I can't remember exact times it was almost 10 years ago after all). But I just couldn't bear hearing the cries at 4 1/2 months. But after a few days of him crying it out, crying himself to sleep, he was a great sleeper. When it came to Tucker, I had to leave and Jesse took over for me ~ he wasn't as difficult cause he hated being held to be fed anyways. With him it was those nap times when he didn't get a bottle that were the problems! They are all pretty well adjusted now ~ But crying it out didn't kill 'em.

Hoping you figure something out soon!

Jesse and Carol Myer said...

You poor Mamma!!! So sorry. I would suggest chamomile tea. Its worth a try:)

Anonymous said...

A definition of spoiling I heard many years ago (my children are all grown) is setting something on a shelf and letting it rot. Babies are meant to be held and it goes by so quickly. As for the solids at 4 mo., I'd say it is a bit early. Too much chance for allergies when solids are given too early and their little digestive systems are just not ready.

missionarymomma said...

This post makes me smile. You know, that I've been there, still am and fully understand smile.

I love the above definition on spoiling. I agree, babies can not be spoiled. The thrive on being held, fed and NURTURED. After years of working in orphanages and having adopted four children I believe the "cry it out" method is selfish -sorry, don't hate me.:-) I also think it can cause a lack of security.

Most of the world co-sleeps.

I would encourage you to re-think solids that young. It's really very young. Grain like rice is also much harder to digest than say, fresh applesauce or sweet potato.

Anyway, just remember, the days are long,but the years are short.

The picture is precious. Easy to see why you got back up from your nap. Although older Momma's asure us a nap should not be an option for a stay at home Mommy.

Oh, and my final 2 cents. A baby is loking for more than the food found in a bottle even if it's breastmilk. Daddy can not give baby the same soothing comfort Momma can at the breast. So cnsider snuggling that baby. You will look back one day and treasure those short moments.

Anonymous said...

As everyone else has said these months will pass but they seem so long as we go through them. She is probably having a growth spurt and needs more food. I was advised that nursing more often and for longer can increase your milk supply,it did work for me. I also had my youngest next to me in bed because then we both got SOME sleep at least!!
Katharine

Gwenda said...

Well, I just have to add my two cents, Kayte...cause I am in the same boat as you...a baby girl who doesn't sleep as much as you would like...so here is an understanding hug for you. I know that looking for a solution seems the sensible thing, after all, being awake so much does make life harder. But there isn't always a quick fix....but it is another opportunity to run to the Lord for the strength you need for the day...sometimes one bleary eyed moment at a time.
I learned to co-sleep with my third baby. Needing my sleep, and recovering from a C-Section were the motivators. I don't let the baby in our bed all the time...just when I am too tired to deal with them anywhere else. Some weeks that is most of the time...but I also want them to be OK in their own bed. (I sleep on my side and put the babies head on my arm so I know I won't roll on them.) I agree with missionarymomma...in our culture, we try to schedule and regulate babies to OUR schedule, and that isn't the best for the baby. When the child is old enough to knowingly defy you...that is the time to make them cry. Until then, pray for strength, hold, rock,listen to them breath, and thank the Lord for the priveledge of it all.
I'll be thinking of you when I am awake tonite :) ~Gwenda

Michelle said...

Follow your mommy instincts. They are usually right. :)

Mendi... said...

Love Missionary Momma's comment..."The days are long but the years are short..."

With our girls now 16 and 11, I would say a big AMEN to that! I can remember those LONG days especially with Mal as she had colic yet now that those lengthy days are past, the years have seemed all too short!

Mendi