After a few months of nice long stretches at night time (about 10:30pm until about 5am), Leila has regressed back to wanting to nurse every 3 hrs. around the clock. I'm struggling to keep up with this new schedule she has picked for us. :/
After my post last week about not being tofu, I'm feeling rather tofu-ish. Being tired makes chocolate-like behavior extra difficult. It almost seems like I'm back to newborn stage... Leila is simply not content unless being held, AND being held in certain ways. Thinking that she was over 4 months and needing more substance in her diet, I started her on rice cereal last week. She gobbled it up fairly well for a beginner, but it didn't seem to agree with her tummy. After two episodes of vomiting (not spitting up... VOMITING) I have put the cereal away. Yesterday, I tried peas instead. So far, no problem but neither is she any happier. Maybe she has a cold? Everyone else I know does. I don't see any other symptoms other than grouchiness and an apparent inability to sleep well unless being cuddled.
By now, someone out there is probably debating whether they should comment and tell me that I'm spoiling her. Part of me would agree and part of me says phooey on that. Babies like being held, and I like holding babies. But I do need to put them down sometimes. I know: she needs to develop her self soothing mechanisms and cultivate healthy sleep habits. I'm just not going to let her cry it out. Sorry. Not saying crying it out is wrong. I have done it in the past... but it never was necessary until the other girls were much older. In both cases it happened like this:
Somewhere between 1 and 1 1/2 yrs. old, the girl would get sick. Of course, I'd take care of them throughout the night for a few nights. Then, after the sickness had past, baby girl decided she rather enjoyed visiting all hours of the night and wanted to keep it up. And mommy, seeing that they were no longer sick, would put them in their cribs and say night night, see you in the morning. Little girl cried for 5 minutes, figured out that I wasn't coming back, and went back to sleep.
So, at 4 months, I'm just not doing it. She wants to nurse, and she does go back to sleep after nursing but not for as long as I like. I planned to make the whole first year breast milk only, but formula (offered by someone other than me....) is becoming more tempting by the minute. I have frozen breast milk defrosting right now, and a bottle and bottle warmer set out on the counter. Let us see if Seth catches my drift. ☺
This morning, I was feeling beyond tired. I was feeling blue. I know I'm in desperate need of a good night's sleep when my normally optimistic view of life takes a downward spiral. Not only did I feel tired, but my life was dismal and sad and I was a pathetic wife and lousy mommy and my house is in disarray and the dog died. Well, we don't actually have a dog but if we did, it would have died this morning. So naturally, I made a pot of coffee. ☺ After two giant mugs of Dunkin' Donuts, I had way more caffeine than I could handle. Instead of helping, I was now irritable and shaky. Booo.
Around 2, I put Eden down for her nap, sent Maddie to "help" Daddy run errands and laid down with Leila in my bed. I am never comfortable co-sleeping but I figured desperate times call for desperate measures. I nursed Leila to sleep and tried to doze off myself. Instead I just laid there thinking how pretty she looked. Then I just had to take a picture. There, I thought. NOW I'll sleep. Nope. Too jittery. Gotta get up and get that picture on my blog RIGHT NOW.
Thus, here I am.
It reminded me of this picture of Maddie from last June. My kids looks so beautiful sleeping. They should do it more often.
Almost as soon as I sat down at my computer, Leila sensed I was no longer in the bed with her and commenced wailing. She is now happily snoozing again... in my lap. Hopefully I didn't scare your comments off. Please do leave your suggestions for a unsatisfied little sweetie. Just don't tell me anything a weary mama couldn't handle. Thank you. ☺